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04/03/2006: "The Curtain is Going up on a New Play --- The Age of the Woman is Dawning."

There is a very good chance that our next president will be a woman. Perhaps not a great woman. Perhaps not even a good woman. But a woman nonetheless. My ideal contest would be a contest between Hillary Rodham Clinton and Condoleezza Rice. What an event that would be! And how wonderful to have the first woman president also be the first black president.

Actually, we've had numerous very capable women presidential possibilities. They were much more capable than the men who got the nod. I'm referring to the late Barbara Jordan and the great Elizabeth Dole. Unfortunately for them and for us they were born too early.

But the really cool thing is that no one even thinks twice about it now. Women have finally arrived. We now have the equal opportunity to prove we're just as awful and capable of doing dumb things as men have been doing for generations.

Or we could prove we can clean up their god awful mess and make America greater than it's ever been.

And how about that Laura Bush saying Hillary isn't a good housekeeper and that the Clintons left the White House in a mess? Maybe all Laura has to do is take care of the house for hubby and his friends. But Hillary has bigger fish to fry.

Women who have careers and bigger things in life than keeping house don't have time to be bothered with those little things.

I've known career women all my life. All of them either had housekeepers or their houses were a mess. As for Laura Bush . . . someone who allegedly sold drugs in college needn't talk about someone who keeps a messy house!

And now Katie Couric will probably be the first anchor woman. She's said to be going to grand old CBS. Who would ever think that the seat of Walter Cronkite would be taken by a woman? How sweet it is!

I had a dear friend who was an entertainer. We were doing the Camelot Inn in Waco, Texas and she got up on stage in all her glory and said, "It's great to be back in the land of big belt buckles and little peters."

The audience laughed for a long time. Then she said, "You know, you Texas men don't believe in equality for women. Well I don't either." (pause) "I wouldn't want to step down to be equal with any man!"

Yes, it's the dawn of a new age --- the age of the women. Thank the gods. It's our turn. It's about time.

Future generations of women will not know how we suffered, how the women before us suffered. They will never know how we were kept down by the thumbs of old fat men. They will not appreciate the fact that not so long ago we couldn't even vote!

Yet they will be standing on our shoulders. They will be standing on the shoulders of millions of women of previous generations who did what they could in small and large ways to give women equality. We uppity women take a lot of crap to give real freedom to all women.

When a woman acts a certain way she's uppity and a bitch. When a man does the same thing he's just great. Well, the curtain is coming down on that play. It's had its run and it's closing. A new play is on Broadway and it's all about women. And it's about time.